Fool me once, shame on you; Fool me twice?

I hope not!

I had started a rant about King Ralph's latest attempt at electioneering - then a friend sent me this as an e-mail:

Dear Cracked,

I wanted to share with you my disgust with the Klein government's latest attempt at campaigning using taxpayer dollars under the guise of "government business".

Of course, I am referring to the latest mailing that was circulated to some three million Albertans - at our own cost of course. This thinly veiled campaign spreads the message that the current government of Alberta has done many great things for us (with the obvious focus on being debt-free), and identifying some of the, ahem, "challenges and opportunities" that we as Albertans face. They identify improving the health care system and investing in education among other options.

Now, this is where the pamphlet gets interesting - the survey. It is obviously engineered to engender the responses that the government wants by pushing our hot buttons and wording the questions in a very one-sided manner. Who among us would claim that a "quality, affordable Alberta health care system" is a low priority, or that we don't want an "outstanding education system" or that it is not important to "build a more diverse, innovative economy" or indeed "provide support to Albertans who need help". Forgive me, by my eye is tearing up at the obvious concern and compassion that OUR Alberta government has for our wellbeing after they have slashed education budgets, tried to privatize health care and don't even let me START in on my opinion on privatized utilities.

I can HEAR the violins playing in the background and can't help but wonder how many sheep, er, um, I mean voters are going to read the pamphlet, and decide that the government is showing care and concern for THEIR well-being, is asking for THEIR opinion, and wants to help THEM! It makes me want to stand up on the podium and explain gently that this is the same government who by their actions has proven time and time again that the opinions and voice of Albertans does NOT count, that they do NOT care about our well-being, and that if they truly believe that Klein cares about THEM that I have a choice piece of waterfront property in Arizona that they might be interested in purchasing.

But, I digress - continuing on the survey, the Klein government goes so far as to state that "Now that the unexpected windfall money no longer has to go to pay down the debt, what priority would you place on...". There is a rather large tasty carrot offered to us in the very first option "Provide a REFUND to EVERY Albertan". Ah, visions of dollar signs and sugarplums dance in the heads of Albertans, they TOO can receive a windfall from the government - imagine, free money! And all they have to do is ASK Klein nicely - that and hope that he gets voted in again so that the promised money actually magically appears in their mailbox. Bah!

As I recall, Klein pulled a similar stunt with the LAST election - he sold off our utilities, and gave each Albertan of voting age a trifling sum of money, a "refund" - or, as I prefer to call it "a bribe". Come on - who among us are so naive that we cannot see his refund as a pitiful attempt to buy more votes? And what is the state of our Utilities now? How much of that bribe money have we had to put into increased rates - face it, we paid the bribe out of our own pocket; and somehow I don't feel a lot of sympathy for a government who wrote me a check out of my own bank account.

Do you want to take a sucker bet? How much do you want to bet that one of two scenarios will take place:

#1. The Klein government announces that an overwhelming number of Albertans have shared their opinions and have asked for a refund. No big surprise there. And - of course - the KLEIN government will hold out as a tasty carrot - er, I mean election promise - that they will continue to listen to Albertans, and out of the goodness of their own hearts , they will send out the refunds just as soon as they are voted back in.

or

#2. The Klein government makes the same announcement as #1, and SENDS out a paltry sum to each Albertan, and puts out an election promise that they will continue to, ahem, "refund" any more windfall monies just as long as they are in power.

I have very little patience for this thinly veiled bribery on the part of our elected officials - and, indeed, I am a little disgusted with the favourable timing timing of this "survey" (and I'm not even sure if I am willing to give it the name "survey" as that would imply that it was a scientifically crafted questionnaire with the intent to poll Albertans in an unbiased manner to determine their views, rather than leading them around using a ring through their noses).

Read the survey for yourself. And recognize it for what it really is - a series of statements designed to lead us into false security that our health care, education system and infrastructure remains in good shape, and that there is hope for the future. False hope - perhaps. Bah!

Thanks, but this election I'll De-Klein.

I think that says it all...

Perhaps, this election we should all go to the polls, but not as the drugged sacrificial bull of Roman sacrifice.